Conscious Co Parenting

Posted on Dec 10, 2020 | 0 comments

Let’s face it, no divorce is easy. And picking up the pieces after can be quite the challenge. Especially when there are children involved.

No matter what we do, think or feel, our children are a permanent link to our ex-spouse, making both parents equally important to them. Given that our children are the most important things to us in our lives, we don’t want to cause them any further unnecessary pain, right?

Think about yourself. How do you feel when anyone insults either your mom and dad? Even if they are right, it is upsetting, isn’t it? Our children feel the same about us and their other parent. Making it super important that we find a healthy – conscious – way of co-parenting.

Some people are great at it and fall right into a healthy rhythm. Other’s really struggle with this, some making huge efforts only to be brick walled by their ex-spouses. So rather than letting the past hold you back and your frustrations hold you down, read these conscious co-parenting tips that will help you get along with even the most difficult ex-spouse and help get your children on a healthy, conscious path to success!

Conscious Co Parenting Tips

Adjust your mindset. Prepare yourself realistically for your situation. You have to share your children and co-parent. There is a lot of positives to that so do your best to list them out and focus on the good.
Watch your mouth! Yup, I said it! It stinks, we want to tell the kids our truths and get out our frustrations, but really at the end of the day, the kids are not involved and it just hurts them more knowing one parent is still hurting the other. Does this mean lie and create a fantasy world? No. But it does mean there is no need to curse, belittle or undermine the other parent in front of the child. It honestly only hurts the kids, no one else. Your ex can not hear you and doesn’t care anyway. So do your best to mind your tongue around the littles.
Keep the lines of communication open. Don’t become so angry that your kids are afraid to talk to you about it. Then you will never know if something does go wrong. When your ex says something about you, explain it’s a shame they have to behave that way. Be the bigger person and encourage your children to speak up about what they like/dislike and what is going on.
Make transitions times as easy as possible. They have to go. There is no two ways about it. So do your best to make it as easy on them as possible.
Be scheduled yet flexible. It is good to have a set schedule that you both agree upon. But it is also important to remember that life happens, and the older the children get, the more last minute things pop up. So you need to be flexible with the other parent. It is a two way street.
Word choice and tone are key. Take your time when communicating with the other parent. How you say things and what you say are key to getting your point across and making the adjustment you need. So write it once and take a bit to think it over. Re-read and take out anything personal or hateful.

Conscious co-parenting is an ever-evolving journey that we are on together. Please share your great tips in the comments!

Cheers!

Malibu Mama Loves Xx