I used to think that the older I got, the more peaceful and easier my life would be. As I became wiser, I would find peace and make better choices leading to happiness. Right?
Well they forgot to mention all of the curve balls life throws at you and boy has the universe had a lot in store for us this past year… Peaceful? Hah, I don’t even know what that is anymore!!
Let’s see, we started off 2019 with a bang and very positive. Being a mom, a writer and a life coach keeps me home a lot. I had set my intentions with one word at the beginning of 2019 which was Thrive (you can read about it here). I wanted to thrive, to try new things, to succeed at what I was doing. I was all in and convinced this would be the best year yet.
Trying Something New
So I had this great idea to try working in a coffee shop one morning. You always see lots of people doing that and I thought it would get me out a little and motivate me with a fresh environment. I packed up my computer and files, got dressed in my big girl pants and off I went to the coffee shop.
I scored a great table with one of those charger things, I had a nice hot tea and a sweet spot with plenty of space considering the cafe was packed. I was all excited to try something new.
I opened my computer so excitedly… it made a little clicking that I had never heard before and then, the worst happened…
My computer erupted with a loud fire alarm sound that silenced the whole café and brought so many uncomfortable stares… O…M…G!
My First Epic Fail of 2019 – Why Me?!
At first I panicked. Was I being hacked? The other people there probably thought I was stealing something. The computer was so loud. I shut my computer quickly, looked around, everyone was looking at me. I gave an embarrassed smile and they turned around so I tried again…
Same horrible loud sound. So embarrassing. Everyone was staring, I was panicking because my computer has my whole life on it and it suddenly wouldn’t start?! I quickly packed up and ran, not walked out of there. Thinking never again!!
I went to the geek squad to be told my hard drive had crashed. I had lost everything that was not in the clouds, which was my second book that I had been working on.
Poof. Gone. In seconds. All of it. Because I wanted to try working outside of the house. Ok, I know that is a bit dramatic and the hard drive would have crashed no matter where I was, but in the moment I was fighting depression and feeling very negative and this just took me down the rabbit hole.
So that happened and then the rest of 2019 followed in suit with one epic heartbreak and fail after another.
But here is the thing, I may not have Thrived in the way I wanted to; yet as this year ends and I reflect back, I realize that 2019 made me so much stronger. I got through things I never thought I could, I faced major setbacks, and I survived. That book was lost because that was not the story that was meant to be told.
It’s time to start again. It’s time to reclaim my passion and my power. My new story is ready to be written.
As I say goodbye tonight to 2019, I’m not only saying goodbye to the year, but to the old me. The girl that got squashed with curve balls last year is getting back up and is ready for to take 2020 head on, I believe this is the year that it will all change, it will be magical. As my children and I house hunt and prepare to move in 2 weeks for our fresh start, excitement is growing in me.
New things are ahead, new opportunities, new experiences, new people. We are changing gears in our household and thanks to the power of positive and the laws of attraction, good things will happen.
Goodbye 2019, to the girl I used to be. I’m glad I survived the year, I’m glad I thrived in the way I was meant to and will use all of the pain 2019 brought to heal and spread light, love and conscious well-being in 2020.
I can’t wait for you 2020!!
Malibu Mama Loves Xx