How to Focus on the Positives
Let’s focus on the positives!
I’ve always been a glass half full kinda girl, but even I have my moments where I can fall prey to those nasty negative thoughts.
You know the kind. When you are going through a difficult season in life or you have taken a new risk and one small negative thought snowballs into an avalanche of pain and/or anger. The kind that can ruin entire days of our lives, if we let them, or effect situations that otherwise would have been fine.
For instance, my husband and I have recently decided to divorce. It has been a really scary process and I won’t lie, there have been several moments where I have almost let a negative thought get out of control… almost!
But given that I am a firm believer that life is all about our perception and we can control that, here is how I focus on the positives and stop those negative thoughts dead in their track.
How to Focus on the Positives
- Exercise and meditate. When I am feeling down, I force myself to get up and go for a walk or to an exercise class followed by taking 10-15 minutes outside to meditate and focus on my breath. This takes my focus away from the negative thoughts, oxygenates my brain making me physically feel happier and mentally I feel like I have accomplished something which always makes one feel good!
- I list as many things as I can think of that I appreciate about my life. Instead of going down the rabbit hole with that negative thought, I climb the ladder of all of the amazing things I do have in my life. Our health, good friends, modern conveniences… I usually can come up with quite a long list of things that will quickly put me in a better mood.
- I start smiling. Smiling is contagious, makes us feel good and signals the brain to produce more of those happy hormones! So, this may sound crazy but I really do do this, in those moments where I am teetering on the edge, I find a mirror, look at myself and smile a few times. It totally lightens my mood, you should try it!
- Talk with an inspirational friend. Calling or reaching out to someone who understands you and can offer you good, loving advice as opposed to feeding your negative thoughts always helps put me in a better mood. Sometimes it can be what gets you through the day!
- Whether we need to forgive someone else or ourselves, we do need to let it go. We can’t change the past, what is done is done. But we can learn from it, we can grow from it and we can move on to do wonderful things.
— Malibu Mama Loves® (@MalibuMamaLoves) August 7, 2016
6. Do something nice for someone else. Helping others and/or doing random acts of kindness are always things that will keep you focused on the positives in life. Giving back in some way for all that we have been given (even when it feels like you have nothing) helps us see just that – all that we have been given.
7. Take responsibility for those negative thoughts. Sitting around, being negative, playing the victim will only invite more negativity in. Instead, I try to look forward and see what sort of lemonade I can make with these lemons that have dropped into my life. Because my life is a result of my choices, I can only learn from those results and move forward to do it better, and you can to.
8. Google positive quotes or websites and read them! There are so many incredible, encouraging people and quotes out there. I find it so uplifting to google ‘positive quotes’ and then spending a few minutes reading them – they are great food for thought.
At the end of the day, those negative thoughts are just that, thoughts. They are not happening in the present moment and may have not even happened yet and may never happen so why worry about them right now?
Just one last thought – It is true that worrying about something negative that may happen actually invites it in to happen, likewise thinking about something positive invites positive things to happen – the Laws of Attraction. So doesn’t it make sense to focus on the positives?
Here’s to your happy thoughts!
Malibu Mama Loves Xx